Posted 5 hours ago
Posted 15 hours ago
Posted 2 days ago
Posted 2 days ago

*FURIOUS SCREECHING*

My mom is out to get me fired from my job.

So lately, she ordered something online from the company I work for. Since she lives at the same address, the system gave her my associate discount.

This ain’t allowed so I talked about it with my supervisor, and we have no idea how to fix it.

I brought it up after I got home, and my mom told me, “Well, if they can’t fix it. It’s not our problem. They can’t stop me from buying.”

"Except for the fact that you’ll get me fired! The evidence still shows up under MY name."

"It’s not our fault. I can sue them if that happens since it’s the system’s fault."

"OH MY GOOOOOOOD. THAT’S ABUSE OF THE SITUATION. WE’LL BE THE ONES SUED."

"No we won’t"

ARGH. I will totally admit that I like my job more than I like my mom.

Posted 2 days ago

lazysmirk:

vittyyluvscookies:

thriftlessvoyage:

brotoro:

alexturnermilk:

kyuubified:

awwnutbunnies:

shinukinomi:

So apparently no one should ever buy sugarless Haribo gummy bears

Fun fact: I once bought sugar free gummy bears. 

This is exactly what happened

Petition for Youtubers to start doing the “Sugarless Gummy Bear Challenge”

FINALLY I FIND THIS SO I CAN SHOW THE WORLD THIS HAS TO BE SEEN

my cousins ate a bunch of these once and got sick as hell

my mom told me it’s because they ate too much candy

now i know it was a LIE

I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED SO HARD AT WHAT WAS ESSENTIALLY A POOP JOKE

HOLY SHIT

Jan 10th, 2014. We did this in the ER because everyone who works in the ER is 6 yrs old. It takes about 2-3 hrs before you begin to feel like you are straight up going to shit your pants. I was on the toilet for an hour. Then I tried to take a shower. I shat myself in the shower. 

It was the funniest thing I will ever fucking do.

It only takes a handful.

Do not do it.

(Source: senpaipunk)

Posted 3 days ago

How my day went today:

I ended up playing Chicken with every single person in the hallway when I visited my old high school. Was twenty minutes late to my meeting thanks to large group standing in hallway(Played chicken with them too).

Had to resist the urge to say “Shut your mouth, you arrogant idiot.” And had to deal with said idiot’s unnecessary 5 minute explanation that could’ve been condensed to “you forgot a negative sign.”

Had to deal with a different idiot with the most first world of first world problems. (“Ugh I’m so tired. I stayed up ‘til 3 watching anime.” “Seriously I need coffee.” “God I don’t even want to be here” over again for 3 hours straight)

Had to tutor FWP idiot since he just can’t get along with his chem lab partner.

Had to put up with that one arrogant guy in speech class

Had to listen to our kinda rude student government president. He’s not a bad person, but he acts kinda self important and has no qualms about interruting people when they’re speaking.

Listening to how the old student gov. actually attempted threatening my club in the past.

Many BS. Much asshattery. Very urge to punch.

Posted 5 days ago

savagelucy42:

romythe:

mydollyaviana:

A crash course on non-disney films and studios (sequels not included; list is not exhaustive)

This should be standard knowledge for movielovers

It is a pet peeve of mine when people refer to any animated film as Disney. And by “pet peeve” I mean it makes me want to punch them in the face.

Posted 5 days ago

allthingshyper:

the-many-fandoms-girl:

If you don’t love that skeleton you’re wrong

SKULLY WAS THE ACTUAL SHIT OKAY

(Source: blackberrystoned)

Posted 5 days ago

nwadadnama:

micthemicrophone:

poeticallybrown:

owl-vortex:

10 things our kids will never understand…

limewire lmao I forgot that was a thing woww. my memory

Fucking Limewire.

So sad.

Posted 5 days ago

queenie-teasy:

mirahxox:

trillaryclinton:

loveniaimani:

blessedbeyoundmeasure15:

pimpkage:

chubby-jean:

camerapits:

saintimpala:

OH MY GOD

OH

MY GOD

wHAT

…I’m not touching that pizza…

Oh LAWD

image

perfect gif usage

Wtf

I can’t stop laughing

XD

image

(Source: onlylolgifs)